Starting Over

He opened the apartment door

New paint smells like old regrets

Hoping for salvation

Finding cold surrender there instead

He once thought that reading On the Road was the same as being free

Living half his life inside a thought, inside a dream he could not be but did believe

You said, “All the stars are cursed 

And time’s a ghost complete unto itself.

All this light preceded thought—” 

The fullness of the universe revealed


Once were sunsets, silhouettes of pain with children still to raise

Nothing gained, nothing earned or lost but what you cannot see or try to be 

It came to him one summer day

A notion that he turned into a dance

He opened the apartment door

New paint smells like old regrets

Ninth Hour

I haven’t slept for now three nights

My back so sore, the gnawing fright

I feel you breathing next to me 

The whisper of some first decree 

Before the sun comes up again

I build a fire and mill the grain

Should I fetch water from the well? 

These days it’s getting hard to tell 

I take the same road up the hill

That road I walk each day until 

I pass the markets filled with souls

Whose spirits seem so bought and sold

Look, my hands still bear the marks

From years of hewing wood and bark 

I’ve worked my fingers to the bone

Without a single thing to show

In the distance I can see the shapes

Empty wills ordained to break 

Lone bodies matted by the sky

Who curse the gods before they die

The nailing of raw flesh to boards

Is muted by the hooded horde

Who’ve gathered here again today

To mock the dead or kneel and pray

I square my hips and hoist the frame

These days they all just feel the same

There’s nothing but the empty sound

Of borrowed time on borrowed ground

As evening redness fades to night

All at last forsake their life

We haul their bodies to the ground

The bandits and the falsely crowned

I made my bet and lost the war

I think of you: my sweet encore

To every day I bore the pain

Of everyone who hangs in vain

I haven’t slept for now three nights

My back so sore, the gnawing fright

I hear you breathing next to me 

The whisper of some first decree 


Hermès Scarf

You wear your sin in chains around your neck

And tattooed over scars on your left wrist

Let’s count the ways you hide behind

That Hermès scarf you bought with last month’s rent

I can smell the sweet scent of Amarula

As you mouth the words to “Come As You Are” 

Playing softly in this mise-en-scene

You chase down your Paxil with a smile

CHORUS

I am so in love with provocation

The kind you carry like loose change

I am so in love with you

Your hopeless point of view

You trip and slur your way upon the truth

Roll that rock up the hill, and do it all again

You recite our grocery list like a hymn: 

Milk, some eggs, and goldfish for the kids

Somewhere you forgot to act; I forgot my line

It takes a lot of guts to fold your hand

So creeps in the petty pace from day to day

I grab my shades and sip a Bulleit neat

CHORUS 


Write Me a Love Song

She said, “Write me a love song not one of those sad songs you always sing

We just had us a baby, and we shouldn’t dwell on them things: 

Grown men whining ‘bout bad times in drunken rhymes, lover’s crimes, and blue eyes cryin’ in the rain

Just tell me you love me and that you’ll hold me through all of life’s pains”  

He said, “Kiss me and touch me tonight, make me feel like a man

Cause this old world’s got a way of bruising me that only you understand

I keep thinking ‘bout hard times with easy rhymes, truth’s lies, and how whiskey eases my pain

Just tell me you’ll love me and that our heartaches are never in vain” 

He likes old books, stiff drinks, and folk singers who don’t sing in key

She laughs at his bad jokes and lets him win some when they disagree

Now he’s over thirty; she still talks dirty, but they wouldn’t dare change a thing

And there’s a song in the way she moves he never could sing

It cost him so little to show her he loved her, but the words weren’t free

And that guitar he’d pawned twice weren’t shaped right for soft melodies

So he dreamed up a young love and wrote of the first time he saw through the fear in her eyes

And he sang her that love song, made vows that time only buys

She said, “Write me a love song not one of those sad songs you always sing”  


Blockader’s Prayer

Intro

Might you tender me some mercy

Might you harbor me some grace   

May we beat the devil swiftly

May we sail from this place

To that Paradise in Glory

Where the mountains smoke at morning

Where the river run forever

And the whiskey shines like gold 

Prelude

It was once upon a harvest moon 

Dogs were on her trail

Running through the pines and rain

A cheated lover’s tale 

Two bodies stone cold silent

Lay witness to the void

Delivered to the darkness

Something deep destroyed 

Act I   

She was born in East Kentucky 

In a haunted, cruel farmhouse 

She learned sin from watching daddy 

And hunger thereabouts

She left home wide-eyed and bitter  

Went chasing silver tongues

Led by stars, fueled by fire

Estranged and young

Act II

War taught him desperation

Guilt gripped hold his soul

He came back missing something

Itching to be whole

He spent two years on the needle

And another on road

Met men of sin and wisdom

Who promised him some dough

Act III

She married for convenience

Grateful to be gone

He married her for beauty

Something he could own

All the gold and silver tarnished

In mansions of despair

They both were missing something

You could feel it in the air 

Act IV

On a cold night in September

The river nearly flood

On her waist she bloused a pistol

In her heart there beat cold blood

He heard the door kick open

Reached quick to grab his gun

She emptied out the chamber

Whispered softly, “It is done.” 


Death Row Blues

Pour me some whiskey cause my mouth is dry

Pour me some whiskey cause my mouth is dry

Don’t my heart ache too, man; that ain’t no lie

 

Lean in a little closer; gonna tell you why

Lean in a little closer; gonna tell you why

My little gal left me and ran off with some other guy 

Went and got me a pistol, took a midnight prowl

Went and got me a pistol, took a midnight prowl

Set off to find the man that took her and get her back anywhichhow

Went down to the river; washed my hands and soul

Went down to the river; washed my hands and soul

Took my pain and all my hurtin’; put ‘em down in a hole  

Pour me some whiskey cause my mouth is dry

Pour me some whiskey cause my mouth is dry

Don’t my heart ache too, man, and that ain’t no lie 


Multiverse

Part I

In another universe I’m 

Lost by the roadside

I’m helpless and going blind I’m 

Begging for more time 

In another universe I’m 

Loved beyond my years 

I’m shameless and cavalier I’m

Branded by fear

In another universe I’m 

Dreaming of being free

I’m washed away at sea I’m 

Sad being me


Part II

In another universe I’m 

Running from the law 

I’m getting closer to the call I’m 

Gallant and flawed

In another universe I’m 

Babbling in tongues 

I’m flying near the sun I’m 

Lost inside your hum 

In another universe I’m 

Alright and feelin’ good

I’m drunk and misunderstood I’m 

Wishing you would

Part III

In another universe I’m 

Used up and all she wrote

I’m mailing letters to the Pope I’m 

Rhyming and dead broke

In another universe I’m 

Hopping trains and heading West 

I’m bound for some great quest I’m 

All and nothing less

In another universe I’m 

Just singing to myself 

I’m unsure and unimpressed I’m 

Dreaming up the rest 


On the Rocks

Do you know how many times I’ve heard that line

The one you’ve practiced all night long

The one I’ve learned to fake a non-response to? 

I see your stare and let it simmer there 

I count the cracks along the walls 

The ones we fixed four thousand times before


CHORUS

You aren’t the first

Won’t be the last

You aren’t the first

Won’t be the last

That summer when you marked the days 

That we made love trying to bring back our love 

By making love a thing we made 

These days I drink the minutes gone

Hours bore; I chase the silence all night long to

Toast an empty glass to

CHORUS


Tonight I drank alone at that corner bar

The one I don’t mind ‘cause it’s the one 

That no one ever goes to

Somebody played a classic country song, and I 

Remember when a song was something 

I could fix my faith to

CHORUS

I stumble through the door, and all the lights are on 

I feel you waiting up for me

And pour myself another drink


Once More With Feeling

I was trying to disappear

Become like the wind, the rain, the sky

I was trying on every fear

Searching for answers, lost in the night


CHORUS

Let there be hopeless faith

Let there be raging grace        

Let there be diamonds from dust 

Let there be love

Let there be cold embrace

Let there be formless shapes 

Let there be the fondest hate

Let there be love

“The life of Man is a long march through the night, surrounded by invisible foes, tortured by weariness and pain, towards a goal that few can hope to reach, and where none may tarry long… Be it ours to shed sunshine on their path, to lighten their sorrows by the balm of sympathy, to give them the pure joy of a never-tiring affection, to strengthen failing courage, to instill faith in hours of despair. Let us not weigh in grudging scales their merits and demerits, but let us think only of their need — of the sorrows, the difficulties, perhaps the blindnesses, that make the misery of their lives.” 

CHORUS

Of Gods and Men

Once upon a time

I moved in you — you moved me, too

The moon was still on fire

I sang alone on my throne

What was was still to come

I was the air; I was the choir

You danced to raise the sun

I am 

The prayer 

I am 

The liar

Once upon a time

You drew the dark — you drew me, too

Words leapt from a spark

You named the stars, called the hours

What was was still to come

I was the air; I was the choir

You danced to raise the sun

I am 

The prayer 

I am 

The liar

Once upon a time

The silence broke — heaven spoke

Your arms took shape as wings

We fell uncrowned toward the ground

You’re a Star

No matter how loud we yelled 

At the screen we knew she wouldn’t — survive the scene

And who would have guessed that her short bloody dress would get auctioned 

And who’s that fashioning a cross

In the corner while the extras — waltz to stir the slaughter?  

Shouldn’t somebody tell them that we’re all just victims here, ohh yeah

Ahh — the horror

Ahh — the holy and the dumb

You’re a star now, baby

Smile for everyone

Under all that gold she wears

She’s canvass thick with makeup — the seraph of the war

The violence and envy we stash behind each noble gesture 

And who’s that man in a mask

Walking slowly out of rhythm — a shrouded refugee?  

Shouldn’t somebody tell him that we’re all just victims here, ohh yeah

Ahh — the horror

Ahh — the holy and the dumb

You’re a star now, baby

Smile for everyone

Like Any Other Man

With a dance you’d wrest devotion 

I close my eyes and chase you there

But all I hear’s the rain ‘a coming

And those neighbors fight and swear

What I mean to say is

Those days were more than nothing

And getting harder to resolve 

What I mean to say is

I wish you’d call

 

Those years went fast as lightning

Ain’t youth wasted on the young? 

Now I go weeks without smiling

Your salt still on my tongue

What I mean to say is

Those days were more than nothing

And getting harder to resolve 

What I mean to say is

I wish you’d call 

There's that place in the kitchen

Where you’d sing and cut my hair

It haunts my recollection

And sits empty as a prayer 

What I mean to say is

Those days were more than nothing

And getting harder to resolve 

What I mean to say is

I wish you’d call 


Ouroboros

I tried to fit the world in a song

Light: a particle, a wave

Dark delivered then bound and slain

Lost in patterns and names

 

You were right about the sound 

It’s forged in shadows and flames

Paid in blood, born of desire

Echoed back to us in choir

We were born into light

Just threshers of stone

We were cast upon the shores

And forced to walk alone

I played the notes by heart

Life: a vision, a curse

Time a wheel spinning fate

Days wanting of weight

I tried to find my way back home

Hope: a dragon, a hearth 

A war inspired then fought and lost    

You were wrong about the cost

We were born into light

Just threshers of stone

We were cast upon the shores

And forced to walk alone

I tried to fit the world in a song


Somewhere Still

There’s a long time between being high and dying

There’s a sad note between being low and gone

There’s a misery felt between your heart and mine, dear

There’s a love lost deep somewhere still

  

There’s an ocean between the clever and lying

There’s a red moon between the sinner and the saved

There’s a tragedy hangin’ between your eyes and mine, dear

There’s a love lost deep sometime still

There’s a truth hiding somewhere on the page

There’s a grace lying somewhere on the trail

There’s beauty somewhere in this pain; I’m sure my dear

There’s a love lost deep somewhere still

 

There’s a bell tolling beyond the lost and forsaken

There’s a field beyond the sacred and profane

There’s a slow rolling thunder on your mind and mine, dear

There’s a love lost deep somewhere still

 

There’s a comfort beyond the shame and the pleasure

There’s a mountain beyond conviction and faith

There’s a mercy felt between your hopes and mine, dear

There’s a love lost deep somewhere still

 

There’s a truth hiding somewhere on the page

There’s a grace lying somewhere on the trail

There’s beauty somewhere in this pain; I’m sure my dear

There’s a love lost deep somewhere still

Somewhere still

Somewhere still

Somewhere still

Fall

It’s that time of the year again when trees catch fire

Your hands in sacred dance across the wire 

Some verse I swore I knew but not the choir

You loved me you said but I never knew what that meant

It meant I should suffer and die for you 

Which is nothing at all if you think about it anyway

Cause to live is to suffer and sing the blues

Does an ocean current deepen without sound? 

Will the lonely beggar hang with the drowned? 

Can the desert flower absolve evil ground? 

     

You loved me you said but I never knew what that meant

It meant I should suffer and die for you 

Which is nothing at all if you think about it anyway

Cause to live is to suffer and sing the blues

It’s that time of the year again when trees catch fire

I’m burning, burning, burn

And fade way 


Last December

You haven’t even touched your eggs

And your coffee’s getting cold

Outside the snow is falling       

I’d forgot we’re getting old

I’d forgot we’re getting old 

Maybe it’s the burning trees 

On the news tuned to a hum

Maybe it’s that aching notion

Or that call we’re waiting on

Feels like forever —

Ohh, forever 

You didn’t even ask one question

You almost braved a smile

I managed to stare out the window

Growing angry like a child

I was angry like a child  

Maybe it’s the pain before us

Or the snow this time of year

Maybe it’s that aching notion

That your smile turned into fear

Feels like forever —

Ohh, forever 

You hadn’t even touched your eggs

And your coffee’d gotten cold

You got up to watch the TV

And left me here alone

You left me here alone

Feels like forever —

Ohh, forever


Sometimes Isn’t Always (And Good Advice Is Hard to Take)                    

Sometimes it's one foot in front of the other, and one day at a time

Sometimes feels like forever, and sometimes nothing rhymes 

Always is never sometimes, but sometimes you get it right

So always drink old, good wine, and burn till you’re out of time

Yesterday we were young and hungry

Went and sold ourselves a lie               

So we packed up all our junk in a van

And swore we’d never die

 

Now we have good jobs and bought a house

And sold those old guitars

And our cars shine like those old stale dreams

We swore we’d never buy 

Sometimes it's one foot in front of the other, and one day at a time

Sometimes feels like forever, and sometimes nothing rhymes 

Always is never sometimes, but sometimes you get it right

So always drink old, good wine, and burn till you’re out of time

When this TV show is over

Let’s head on up the stairs

To replay the same old tired scene

That getting us nowhere

But hey, tomorrow let’s map out a plan

And reclaim all we are

We’ll wave goodbye to all we have

That’s killing who we are 

Sometimes it's one foot in front of the other, and one day at a time

Sometimes feels like forever, and sometimes nothing rhymes 

Always is never sometimes, but sometimes you get it right

So always drink old, good wine, and burn till you’re out of time


Beyond Good and Evil

She said, “God is dead,” and took a long, slow sip

I used to love the smell of scotch and Nietzsche on her lips

When things got good, she’d be the first to go

Should have seen the pileup coming all those years ago

 

It was something in the way she moved her hips

And that unrepentant timbre and her soft eclipse

She had me beggin’ for a bite ‘fore the fruit was ripe

And a thousand-yard stare that fit my vision just right

 

It was cold May night about a decade back

When the neighbors called the cops ‘fore I drank my six-pack

Josie’s toys made him pause ‘fore he walked me outside

Sobered up an hour later, sick and tired

 

I found the test in the trash, such are vicious gifts

And her note in my book like a poet’s fist

Didn’t mean a thing then; doesn’t mean a thing still

Just more haunted lost souls in the killing fields

 

She said, “It’s not your fault,” and left her key in the door

I felt the wounds tear open bleeding from our silent war

She didn’t give me a name; didn’t give a goddamn

Just left a trace of nothing and a blue sedan

Some Other Fire

It must have been 2:00 AM

Ghosts rise in the darkest hour

Your pillow cold

Still smells like flowers

Was it in LA? 

Long years melt into night

Weren’t we working in stone? 

Weren’t we in a fight? 

                                            

Where are you tonight?       

Did you trade in your soul for silver and spite?

Where are you tonight? 

We were a fool’s parade

You with your dull desire

While I buried the ashes

From some other fire

Staging odes to pain

You made your beauty a knife

That you stuck in my back  

Now you’re his wife. 

Where are you tonight?       

Did you trade in your soul for silver and spite?

Where are you tonight? 

It must be 2:00 AM

Ghosts rise in the darkest hour


Peace For All

What kind of poems did you speak

While the world fell fast asleep? 

(Did you) shout or let the silence stand in for you? 

Where your symbols broken bells 

Or shapes deep from the well?

(Did you) cry or light a cigarette in mourning?

Da, Shantih, Shantih, Shantih, Om

Da, Shantih, Shantih, Shantih, Om

What kind of message did you leave 

With no one there to grieve?

(Did you) laugh while the sacred became shadows?

Where your signs a pretty joke

Or a tongue you only spoke?

(Did you) see the works of your creation?  

Da, Shantih, Shantih, Shantih, Om

Da, Shantih, Shantih, Shantih, Om